Wilt Thou Torchy
close." 

 "The idea!" says, she.  "Why come to the theater, anyway?" 

 "Lean closer and I'll whisper," says I. 

 "Silly!" says she.  "Here! Have a chocolate." 

 "Toss," says I, openin' my mouth. 

 Vee snickers.  "Suppose I missed and hit the fat man beyond?" 

 "It's a sportin' chance he takes," says I.  "Shoot." 

 I had to bump Fatty a bit makin' the catch; but when he sees what the game is, he comes back with the friendly grin. 

 "There!" says Vee, tintin' up.  "Now behave." 

 "Sorry," says I, "but I had to field my position, didn't I? Once more, now." 

 "Certainly not," says Vee.  "Besides, there goes the curtain." 

 And if it hadn't been for interruptions like that we might have had a perfectly good time. We generally do when we're let alone. To sort of string the fun out I suggests goin' somewhere for tea. And it was while we're swappin' josh over the toasted crumpets and marmalade that we discovers a familiar-lookin' couple on the dancin' surface. 

 "Why, there's Doris!" says Vee. 

 "And the happy hubby!" I adds.  "Hey, Westy! Come nourish yourself." 

 Maybe you remember that pair? Sappy Westlake, anyway. He's the noble, fair-haired youth that for a long time Auntie had all picked out as the chosen one for Vee, and he hung around constant until one lucky day Vee had this Doris Ull come for a visit. 

 Kind of a pouty, peevish queen, Doris was, you know. Spoiled at home, and the job finished at one of these flossy girls' boardin'-schools where they get a full course in court etiquette and learn to call the hired girl Smith quite haughty. 

 But she looked good to Westy, and, what with the help Vee and I gave 'em, they made a match of it.  
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