"From what I recollect of those houses that Doyle lets I should say that he richly deserves prosecution." 

 "Nobody was ever ill in the houses," said the Major.  "There hasn't been a case of typhoid in the town as long as I can remember." 

 "That's not the point," said Meldon.  "You're looking at the matter in the wrong way altogether. There never is typhoid anywhere until you begin to be sanitary. The absence of typhoid simply goes to show that sanitation has been entirely neglected. That's probably one of Simpkins' strongest points." 

 "If that's so, we'd be better without sanitation." 

 "Certainly not," said Meldon.  "You might just as well say that we'd be better without matches because children never died of eating the heads off them before they were invented. Which reminds me that I caught the baby in the act of trying to swallow a black-headed pin the other day; and that, of course, would have been a great deal worse than getting whooping-cough. The thing had been stuck into the head of a woolly bear by way of an eye. She pulled it out, which I think shows intelligence, and—" 

 "I thought you said, J. J., that you wanted to get through with this enquiry and go to bed." 

 "I do," said Meldon.  "But I naturally expected you'd take some interest in the mental development of my baby. After all, she's your godchild. You wouldn't have liked it if she'd swallowed that pin. However, if you don't care to hear about her, I won't force her on your attention. Go on about Doyle and the drains. What happened?" 

 "The doctor refused to act, of course," said the Major. 

 "Naturally," said Meldon; "he didn't care about bringing typhoid into the town." 

 "You'd have thought Simpkins would have dropped it then, but he didn't. He reported the doctor to the Board of Guardians for neglect of duty." 

 "We're getting on," said Meldon, taking a note on a fresh sheet of paper.  "You started out to prove that Simpkins is a meddlesome ass. You've got half way. He's certainly an ass. Didn't he know that Doyle was chairman of the Board of Guardians?" 

 "He must have known that, of course." 

 "Then he's an ass. No one who wasn't an ass could possibly expect Doyle to pass a vote of censure on the doctor for 

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