Ib-sen—do you get me? I was proud of this; for—believe you me—getting refinement means work, just like any other achievement, and I had modeled myself on Mrs. Pieter van Norden for years, than whom there is surely no one more refined by reputation, though I had never seen her. I could see Jim felt the same about all this, and we exchanged a look on it; for, besides being engaged to be married we was the best of friends when we come in—when we come in! Remember that!

After we said "How do ye do?" to Ruby, I whispered to Jim not to celebrate too much.[Pg 19] He ain't a drinking man if for no other reasons but those of my own; but just oncet in a while he'd get a little more than he should, and this opening night the show had gone awful big. Had he but heeded me better! Alas! Nothing doing; it was all in vain!

[Pg 19]

For description of party see any motion-picture film on Vice. Why waste words on what is so well known? And—believe you me—this was just like a fillum; and, as I have said, nothing like that for mine, usually. But, even so, we might of got off safe and home without no trouble—only for Von Hoffman and the baby alligator.

It seems like this here Von Hoffman was stuck on Ruby; in fact, it was him that suggested her singing Overseas in that fierce costume. Also, he gave her the alligator, she having tried to pick on a present he couldn't possibly get when he wanted to buy her something. But, being German by descent, he had the efficiency to get it, anyways; and there was the alligator at the party, about fifteen inches long, with a gold collar and diamonds in the collar—and we at war!

Well, it seems this alligator hadn't eat since it come; and after Ruby had a double Bronx[Pg 20] and two glasses of champagne the memory of his hunger began to worry her—do you get me? So she had him brought in and set in the middle of the supper table on the orchids at two dollars per each, which he sat on without moving while the crowd tried everything on him, from olives to wine, with no success. The alligator seemed a awful boob, for he just lay there like a stuffed one, which we knew he wasn't on account of his not having eaten.

[Pg 20]

Well, Jim hadn't heeded me. I guess the truth must be told, though, honest, he had took but very little; still, being unused to it, the effect was greater—do you get me? And pretty soon he and this Von Hoffman was kidding each other and that alligator something fierce.

 Prev. P 5/141 next