I suddenly realised that I was right under the lee of the big guns, and facing the big guns of the fort just across the water; and the searchlights over there suddenly started playing and picked me out. I got frightened, absolutely scared. I got frightened, absolutely scared. I could have screamed. I could have screamed. Every minute I expected to see those big guns fire; only the month before a German spy in woman's clothes had been found wandering just where I stood. Every minute I expected to see those big guns fire; only the month before a German spy in woman's clothes had been found wandering just where I stood. I knew the marines behind the searchlights could see me quite clearly, probably even my white mackintosh. I had asked father to let me go to the fort. He wasn't keen. I'm twenty-three, but he pretends to himself that I'm not "out"—it saves dresses, so I never go anywhere. I knew the marines behind the searchlights could see me quite clearly, probably even my white mackintosh. I had asked father to let me go to the fort. He wasn't keen. I'm twenty-three, but he pretends to himself that I'm not "out"—it saves dresses, so I never go anywhere. I was in an absolute panic, and I felt as if all the muscles of my knees had suddenly turned to water, which wibble-wobbled every time I moved them. I was in an absolute panic, and I felt as if all the muscles of my knees had suddenly turned to water, which wibble-wobbled every time I moved them. I turned back; and those searchlights never left me alone, one steady bar of brilliant, dazzling light kept me focussed the whole time, and I could not see to walk in it. I felt as though every step might be a drop into space. I turned back; and those searchlights never left me alone, one steady bar of brilliant, dazzling light kept me focussed the whole time, and I could not see to walk in it. I felt as though every step might be a drop into space. It was a perfectly beastly experience, and every minute I expected the guns to belch out at me. It
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