White Magic: A Novel
“Yes, I know it does. It seems so to me, whenever I’m—here—and even when I’m not here.”

“Why bother about such things?” said he in the tone that indicates total lack of interest.

After a pause she said: “You may not believe it, but I’m a frightful snob—out there.”

“But not here. There’s nothing here to be snob about—thank God!”

“Yes—I’m as different as possible—out there,”[36] she went on. “There are people I detest whom I’m sweet to because of what they are socially. I’m like the rest of the girls—crazy about social position and fond of snubbing people—and——”

[36]

“Don’t tell me about it,” he interrupted gently, but with an expression in his straight, honest eyes that made her blush and hang her head. “I’m sorry for what you are when the black magician who rules beyond the bend takes possession of you. But what he does to you doesn’t change what the white magic makes of you here.”

Her eyes, her whole face lighted up. “The white magic,” she repeated softly. After a brief reverie she came back to the subject and went on, “I told you because I—I’m ashamed to be a fraud with you.... I wonder if you’re really as big and honest as you seem? Nobody is—out there. They’re mean and petty!—when you see through what they pretend to be—pretend even to themselves. I’m just as big a fraud as the rest. And I often convince myself I’m sweet and good and— If I could only—” There she stopped, leaving her wish unexpressed but easy to imagine.

“The way to keep the little things out is to fill one’s mind with the big things,” said he. “But you’re not to blame for being what your surroundings compel.”

[37]“Do you think I could be different?” she asked, waiting in a sort of breathlessness for his answer.

[37]

“I’ve not thought about it,” was his depressing answer. “Offhand I should say not. You’re at the age when almost everybody does a little thinking. But that’ll soon stop, and you’ll be what you were molded to be from babyhood.”

“I know I don’t amount to much,” said she humbly. “Out there—under the black magic—I’m vain and proud. But here—I feel I’m just nothing.”

“You’re a superb model,” said he consolingly. “Really—superb.”


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