“Very good indeed. Simpkins it is. I beg your pardon.”

“You’re going to get splinters in you if you don’t get up,” states Magpie.

“Thank you very, very much,” says he, handing the letter to Magpie.

“This is my—er—introductions, Mr. Simpson.”

“S-i-m-p-k-i-n-s,” spells Magpie.

“Ah, yes. Very simple.”

“Yes,” says I. “Very.”

Magpie opens the letter, and I reads it over his shoulder.

CONTENTS

My Dear Simpkins:

The bearer, Professor Ajax Ulysses Green, B.A., F.H.S., K.P., I.O.O.F., B.P.O.E., etc., etc., is desirous of testing out some pet theory, and I am taking the liberty of sending him to you, knowing that you and Ike will see that he gets what is coming to him. Do with him as you will—and I know you will.

Professor Pettingill joins me in sending you our best regards and hopes some day to see you again. Remember us to Dirty Shirt Jones, and all the rest of the Pelicans we met in the county of Yellow Rock.

 P. S.—As Dirty Shirt says, “For ——’s sake, did you ever see the like?” He really is considered a brilliant man, and devoted to his work. Do as you see fit—but spare him, as Pettingill and myself will not rest well until he returns to Boston and tells of his experiences.

“Professor Middleton is one of my dear, dear friends,” explains this alphabetical person sweet-like. “He was primarily responsible for my coming. You may thank him.”

“My!” gasps Magpie. “I may, may I? Well, well! Come in, Ajax.”

“I prefer to be known as Professor Green, if it is not too much trouble,” says he stiff-like, but Magpie grins and says:

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