Little Masterpieces of American Wit and Humor Volume I
    Mr. C.

   "Gimmeni!"

    Widow

   (

    rising

   ). "Git out, I say—I ain't a-gwine to start' here and be insulted under my own ruff—and so git along—and if ever you darken my door again, or say a word to Melissy, it'll be the woss for you—that's all."

    Mr. C.

   "Treemenjous! What a buster!"

    Widow.

   "Go 'long—go 'long—go 'long, you everlastin' old gum. I won't hear another word" [stops her ears]. "I won't, I won't, I won't."

    [

     Exit Mr. Crane.

    (

     Enter Melissa, accompanied by Captain Canoot.

    )

   "Good-evenin', Cappen Well, Melissy, hum at last, hey? Why didn't you stay till mornin'? Party business keepin' me up here so late waitin' for you—when I'm eny most tired to death ironin' and workin' like a slave all day—ought to ben abed an hour ago. Thought ye left me with agreeable company, hey? I should like to know what arthly reason you had to s'pose old Crane was agreeable to me? I always despised the critter; always thought he wuz a turrible fool—and now I'm convinced on't. I'm completely disgusted wit him—and I let him know it to-night.

   I gin him a piece o' my mind 't I guess he'll be apt to remember for a spell. I ruther think 
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