uncle Jack are in jail, too."

   The congressman from California was telling at dinner in the hotel of tuna fishing.

   "Just run out in a small motor boat," he explained, "and anything less than a hundred pounds is poor sport."

   The colored waiter was so excited that he interrupted:

   "You say you go after hundred-pound fish in a little motor boat, suh?"

   The congressman nodded.

   "But," the darky protested, "ain't you scairt fer fear you'll ketch one?"

   An eminent statesman was being driven rapidly by his chauffeur, when the car struck and killed a dog that leaped in front of it. At the statesman's order, the chauffeur stopped the car, and the great man got out and hurried back to where a woman was standing by the remains. The dead dog's mistress was deeply grieved, and more deeply angered. As the statesman attempted to address her placatingly, she turned on him wrathfully, and told him just what she thought, which was considerable and by no means agreeable. When, at last, she paused for breath, the culprit tried again to soothe her, saying:

   "Madam, I shall be glad to replace your dog."

   The woman drew herself up haughtily, surveyed the statesman with supreme scorn, and hissed:

   "Sir, you flatter yourself!"

   The debutante was alarmed over the prospect of being taken in to dinner by the distinguished statesman.

   "Whatever can we talk about?" she demanded anxiously of her mother.

   Afterward, in the drawing-room, she came to her mother with a radiant smile.

   "He's fine," she exclaimed. "We weren't half way through the soup before we were chatting cozily about the fleas in Italian hotels."

   The gentleman at the party, who was old enough to know better, turned to another guest, who had just paused beside him:

   "Women are fickle. See that pretty woman by the window? She was smiling at me flirtatiously a 

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