principal. I can teach sifring, reading, writing, joggerfee, surveying, grammur, spelling, definition, parsin—"

   "Are you a linguist?"

   "Sir?"

   "You, of course, understand the dead languages?"

   "Well, can't say I ever seed much of them, though I have heerd tell of them; but I can soon larn them—they ain't more than a few of them I allow?"

   "Oh! my dear sir, it is not possible—we—can't—"

   "Well, I never seed what I couldn't larn about as smart as anybody—"

   "Mr. Rapid, I do not mean to question your abilities; but if you are now wholly unacquainted with the dead languages, it is impossible for you or any other talented man to learn them under four or five years."

   "Pshoo! foo! I'll bet I larn one in three weeks! Try me, sir,—let's have the furst one furst—how many are there?"

   "Mr. Rapid, it is utterly impossible; but if you insist, I will loan you a Latin book—"

   "That's your sort, let's have it, that's all I want, fair play."

   Accordingly, I handed him a copy of Historiæ Sacræ, with which he soon went away, saying, he "didn't allow it would take long to git through Latin, if 'twas only sich a thin patch of a book as that."

   In a few weeks, to my no small surprise, Mr. Solomon Rapid again presented himself; and drawing forth the book began with a triumphant expression of countenance:

   "Well, sir, I have done the Latin."

   "Done the Latin!"

   "Yes, I can read it as fast as English."

   "Read it as fast as English!!"

   "Yes, as fast as English—and I didn't find it hard at all."

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