Masterpieces of American Wit and Humor
gambling Christianly baptized…. Lu is my favorite sister; Lovegrove
an unusually good article of brother-in-law; and I cannot say that
any of my nieces and nephews interest me more than their two
children, Daniel and Billy, who are more unlike than words can paint
them. They are far apart in point of years; Daniel is twenty-two,
Bill eleven. I was reminded of this fact the other day by Billy, as
he stood between my legs, scowling at his book of sums.

   "'A boy has eighty-five turnips and gives his sister thirty'—pretty
present for a girl, isn't it?" said Billy, with an air of supreme
contempt, "Could

    you

   stand such stuff—say?"

   I put on my instructive face and answered:

   "Well, my dear Billy, you know that arithmetic is necessary to you if
you mean to be an industrious man and succeed in business. Suppose
your parents were to lose all their property, what would become of
them without a little son who could make money and keep accounts?"

   "Oh," said Billy, with surprise, "hasn't father got enough stamps to
see him through?"

   "He has now, I hope; but people don't always keep them. Suppose they
should go by some accident, when your father was too old to make any
more stamps for himself?"

   "You haven't thought of Brother Daniel—"

   True; for nobody ever had in connection with the active employments
of life.

   "No, Billy," I replied, "I forgot him; but then, you know, Daniel is
more of a student than a business man, and—"

   "Oh, Uncle Teddy! you don't think I mean he'd support them? I meant
I'd have to take care of father and mother and him, too, when they'd

 Prev. P 28/140 next 
Back Top
Privacy Statement Terms of Service Contact