I'll tell you who it does favor. It looks like one of your boarders, Mr. ——, of Ohio.' There was a loud burst of laughter at my saying so, and, upon turning round, I saw Mr. ——, of Ohio, within three feet of me. I was in a right awkward fix; but bowed to the company, and told 'em, I had either slandered the monkey, or Mr. ——, of Ohio, and if they would tell me which, I would beg his pardon. The thing passed off, but the next morning, as I was walking the pavement before my door, a member came to me and said, 'Crockett, Mr. ——, of Ohio, is going to challenge you.' Said I, 'Well, tell him I am a fighting fowl. I s'pose if I am challenged, I have the right to choose my weapons?' 'Oh yes,' said he. 'Then tell him,' said I, 'that I will fight him with bows and arrows.'"

    When

   the great Lord Clive was in India, his sisters sent him some handsome presents from England; and he informed them by letter, that he had returned them an "

    elephant

   ;" (at least, so they read the word;) an announcement which threw them into the utmost perplexity; for what could they possibly do with the animal? The true word was "equivalent."

    Mr. Pitt

   , once speaking in the House of Commons, in the early part of his career, of the glorious war which preceded the disastrous one in which the colonies were lost, called it "the last war." Several members cried out, "The last war but one." He took no notice; and soon after, repeating the mistake, he was interrupted by a general cry of "The last war but one—the last war but one." "I mean, sir," said Mr. Pitt, turning to the Speaker, and raising his sonorous voice, "I mean, sir, the last war that Britons would wish to remember." Whereupon the cry was instantly changed into an universal cheering, long and loud.

    When

   an impudent fellow attempts to kiss a Tennessee girl, she "cuts your acquaintance;" all their "divine luxuries are preserved for the lad of their own choice." When you kiss an Arkansas girl, she hops as high as a cork out of a champagne bottle, and cries, "Whew, how good!" Catch an Illinois girl and kiss her, and she'll say, "Quit it now, you know I'll tell mamma!" A kiss from the girls of old Williamson is a tribute paid to their beauty, taste, and amiability. It is not

    accepted

   , however, until the gallant youth who offers it is

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