of which is in the region of the equator, you will appreciate what it means to lie on your back in an upper berth and try to get your shoes off.

   And this goes double for the man who weighs more than 225 pounds.

   Every time I reached for my feet to get my shoes off I bumped my head off, and the more I bumped my head off the less I got my shoes off, and the less I got my shoes off the more I seemed to bump my head off, so I decided that in order to keep my head on I had better keep my shoes on also.

   Then I tried to divorce my suspenders from my shoulders, but just as I got the suspenders half way over my head I struck my crazy bone on the rafters, and there I was, suspendered between Heaven and earth, but praying with all my heart for a bottle of arnica.

    Then

   I decided to sleep as nature made me, with all my clothes on, including my rubbers.

   So I stretched out, but just then the train struck a curve and I went up in the air till the ceiling hit me, and then I bounced over to the edge of the precipice and hung there, trembling on the verge.

   Below me all was dark and gloomy, and only by the hoarse groans of the snorers could I tell that the Pullman Company was still making money.

   Luck was with me, however, for just then the train struck an in-shoot curve which pushed me to the wall, and I bumped my head so completely that I fell asleep.

   When I woke up a small package of daylight was peeping into the car, so I decided to descend from my cupboard shelf at once.

   I peeped out through the aluminum curtains, but there was no sign of the colored porter and the step-ladder was invisible to the naked eye.

   The car was peaceful now with the exception of a gent in lower No. 4, who had a strangle hold on a Beethoven sonata and was beating the cadenza out of it.

   I made a short prayer and concluded to fall out, but just then one of my feet rested on something solid, so I put both feet on it and began to step down.

   Alas, however, the moment I put my weight on it my stepping-stone gave way and I fell overboard with a splash.

   "How dare you put your feet on my head?" yelled 

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