around the world in sixty days for a big sale.

   FOOL, A., a spendthrift lover. Fell in love with an unintelligent woman and one who never could understand. Followed his natural bents, even as you and I. Wasted several years. Wept profusely. End unknown. Recreation: Vampires. Epitaph: He Was Not The Only One.

   FRANKLIN, Benjamin, one of the few Americans endowed with brains. He discovered that lightning was composed of electricity, that politics paid better than printing, and that the French Court was more lively than the Continental Congress.

   FRERES, Pathe, patron of the motion picture fanatics.

   FRIEND, A., the scarcest thing on earth. A rare visitor, but he came around a few times in a lifetime. F. was glad to know of your success, pitied you in your failures, and shook you by the hand when you were down and out. Never borrowed money, but he frequently lent it. Was a wise counsellor. Very popular. His name was frequently given the baby (see Mischief). Ambition: The other fellow's welfare. Recreation: At the other fellow's house. Address: The other fellow's house or his own. Clubs: All.

   FRITCHIE, Barbara, a Southern target. Sprang into poetry as the only woman in the history of mankind who admitted her old age.

   FULTON, Robert, inventor. Another brainy American who made a fortune for the Cunard and White Star lines.

   GABRIEL, A., trumpeter. Entered history at an early date as the agent for the Garden of Eden. Compelled the Adam family to move. Historians claim he will again be in Who's Who when St. Peter (see him) makes the inventory. Ambition: Larger lungs. Recreation: Aviation.

   GAINSBOROUGH, T. R. A., a versatile English hat and portrait manufacturer.

   GALILEO, inventor, star gazer. Proved himself an imbecile by declaring the world revolved when everybody knew it was stationary. Manufactured the first spy-glass, an instrument which has since been used in theatres and for various other purposes. Also discovered that clocks were equipped with pendulums.

   GANGSTER, T. H. E., a politician known as a "progressive" when out of office.

   GARDEN,(3) Mary, a clever actress who succeeded on the opera stage. Legend has it that Mary possessed a fine voice as a child. This was expensively cultivated in Europe, was later exposed before English and 

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