The Yellow Wallpaper
long time what the thing was that showed behind,—that dim sub-pattern,—but now I am quite sure it is a woman. 

 By daylight she is subdued, quiet. I fancy it is the pattern that keeps her so still. It is so puzzling. It keeps me quiet by the hour. 

 I lie down ever so much now. John says it is good for me, and to sleep all I can. 

 Indeed, he started the habit by making me lie down for an hour after each meal. 

 It is a very bad habit, I am convinced, for, you see, I don’t sleep. 

 And that cultivates deceit, for I don’t tell them I’m awake,—oh, no! 

 The fact is, I am getting a little afraid of John. 

 He seems very queer sometimes, and even Jennie has an inexplicable look. 

 It strikes me occasionally, just as a scientific hypothesis, that perhaps it is the paper! 

 I have watched John when he did not know I was looking, and come into the room suddenly on the most innocent excuses, and I’ve caught him several times looking at the paper! And Jennie too. I caught Jennie with her hand on it once. 

 She didn’t know I was in the room, and when I asked her in a quiet, a very quiet voice, with the most restrained manner possible, what she was doing with the paper she turned around as if she had been caught stealing, and looked quite angry—asked me why I should frighten her so! 

 Then she said that the paper stained everything it touched, that she had found yellow smooches on all my clothes and John’s, and she wished we would be more careful! 

 Did not that sound innocent? But I know she was studying that pattern, and I am determined that nobody shall find it out but myself! 

 Life is very much more exciting now than it used to be. You see I have something more to expect, to look forward to, to watch. I really do eat better, and am more quiet than I was. 

 John is so pleased to see me improve! He laughed a little the other day, and said I seemed to be flourishing in spite of my wallpaper. 

 I turned it off with a laugh. I had no intention of telling him it was because of the wallpaper—he would make fun of me. He might even want to take me away. 


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