"Gentlemen Prefer Blondes": The Illuminating Diary of a Professional Lady
heard Louie come in because I heard him kissing Robber. I mean Louie is always kissing Robber and Dorothy told Louie that if he did not stop kissing Robber, people would think that he painted batiks.

So now I must join the others and I will put the diamond tiara in my hand bag so that Louie and Robber will feel that it is always around and we will all go shopping. And I almost have to smile when I think of Lady Francis Beekman.

May 3rd:
Yesterday was really delightful. I mean Louie and Robber bought Dorothy and I some delightful presents. But then they began to run out of all the franks they had with them, so they began to get discouradged but just as soon as they began to get discouradged, I gave Robber my hand bag to hold while I went to the fitting room to try on a blouse. So he was cheered up quite a lot, but of course Dorothy stayed with them and kept her eye on Robber so he did not get a chance. But it really cheered him up quite a lot to even hold it.

So after all their franks were gone, Robber said he would have to telephone to some one, so I suppose he telephoned to Lady Francis Beekman and she must have said All right because Robber left us at a place called the Cafe de la Paix because he had to go on an errand and when he came back from his errand he seemed to have quite a lot more franks. So then they took us to luncheon so that after luncheon we could go out shopping some more.

But I am really learning quite a lot of French in spite of everything. I mean if you want delicious chicken and peas for luncheon all you have to say is “pettypas” and “pulle.” I mean French is really very easy, for instance the French use the word “sheik” for everything, while we only seem to use it for gentlemen when they seem to resemble Rudolf Valentino.

So while we were shopping in the afternoon I saw Louie get Dorothy off in a corner and whisper to her quite a lot. So then I saw Robber get her off in a corner and whisper to her quite a lot. So when we got back to the Ritz, Dorothy told me why they whispered to her. So it seems when Louie whispered to Dorothy, Louie told Dorothy that if she would steal the diamond tiara from me and give it to him and not let his papa know, he would give her 1000 franks. Because it seems that Lady Francis Beekman has got her heart set on it and she will pay quite a lot for it because she is quite angry and when she really gets as angry as she is, she is only a woman with one idea. So if Louie could get it and his papa would not find it out, he could keep all the money for himself. So it 
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