problematical.

    To wear an actual belt round a waist of such dimensions would be impossible even if it

    could be of any use. Instead, therefore, the Earth wears round her middle an imaginary line called the Equator.

    To give this imaginary belt some excuse for existence we have depicted the Earth in an imaginary ballet skirt, which without in any way hampering her movements complies with the strict regulations pertaining to feminine attire.

    Being self-centred, the Earth has naturally an exaggerated sense of self-esteem.

    Other Spheres of equal or greater importance are referred to as “Luminaries” and supposed to exist chiefly for the purpose of furnishing light when the Sun and Moon are otherwise engaged.

     Oh would some Power the giftie gie her

     To see, as other Planets see her!

     Can an imaginary line be said to exist?

     If not, why does it need an excuse for existence?

     THE EARTH’S CRUST

    Matter-of-fact Geologists speak of the Earth’s Crust as if there were only one Crust.

    Thoughtful people (like ourselves) who can read between imaginary lines, know that there are (as in a pie) two Crusts, the Upper Crust and the Under Crust.

    The Upper Crust is pleasantly situated on the top and is rich and agreeable and much sought after.

    The Under Crust is soggy and disagreeable. The only apparent reason for its existence is to hold up the Upper Crust.

    To quote the eminent Nonsensologist Gelett Burgess—

     The Upper Crust is light as snow

      And gay with sugar-rime;

     The Under Crust must stay below,

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