our
domain an' 'tis a rule iv th' game that we've taken ye into that no wan
shall have more thin wan wife at a time that annywan knows iv. In'
behalf iv th' comity iv th' Society f'r th' Supprission iv Poly-gamy, I
request ye to discard Nora an' Eileen an' Mary Ann an' Sue an' Bimbi an'
th' r-rest iv th' bunch, an' cleave on'y to Lucille. I judge be her
looks that she's th' first Missus Haitch.'

   "No, sir. If he did he'd reach th' ship that runs between our outlying
wards without a hair to his head. Instead iv reproachin' Hadji with his
domestic habits, wan iv th' envoys that ar-re imployed in carryin'
messages fr'm th' prisidint to his fellow-citizens, proceeds to th'
pretty little American village iv Sulu, where he finds Hadji settin' up
on a high chair surrounded be wives. 'Tis a domestic scene that'd make
Brigham Young think he was a bachelor. Hadji is smokin' a good seegar
an' occasionally histin' a dhrink iv cider, an' wan iv th' ladies is
playin' a guitar, an' another is singin' 'I want ye my Sulu,' an'
another is makin' a tidy, an' three or four hundred more ar-re sewin'
patches on th' pants iv th' Hadji kids. An' th' ambassadure he says:
'Mos' rile an' luminous citizen, here is a copy iv th' Annual
Thanksgivin' pro-clamation,' he says. 'Tis addhressed to all th' hearty
husbandmen iv our belovid counthry, manin' you among others,' he says.
'An' here,' he says, 'is th' revised constitution,' he says. 'Th'
original wan,' he says, 'was intinded f'r ol' stick-in-th'-muds that
wudden't know th' difference between a harem an' a hoe,' he says. 'This
wan,' he says, 'is more suited f'r th' prisint gay an' expansive times,'
he says. 'It permits a man to cleave to as manny wives,' he says, 'as
his race, color, an' prevyous condition iv servitude will permit,' he
says. 'Thank ye kindly,' says Hadji, 'I'll threasure these here papers
as a vallyable meminto fr'm that far distant home iv mine which I have
niver see,' he says. 'I'd inthrojooce ye to Mrs. Hadji wan by wan,' he
says, 'but 'twud be betther,' he says, 'f'r to stand up here an' be
prisinted to her as a whole,' he says, 'f'r,' he says, ''tis growing
late an' I want ye to come up to th' house,' he says, 'an' pick a
mission'ry with me,' he says. 'A Baptist,' he says, 'raised on th'
farm,' he says. An' Hadji holds his job an' looks for'rard to th' day
whin we'll have female suffrage an' he can cast th' solid vote iv Sulu
for himsilf f'r prisident."

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